Would YOU let your teenager sleep with their boy/girlfriend at your home?
There is an article in the Daily Mail on the above subject, you can see it here: Would You let your teenage daughter sleep with her boyfriend at your home?
Many of us have teenagers and I think this is an interesting topic.
When my daughter was smaller her father said No Way would a boy ever stay over, I didn't like it, but he would have put his foot down and that would have been that.
As a single parent, the onus is on me to decide.
Is it healthy? Are we teaching them healthy sexual relationships if we allow them or are we encouraging them to have sex and become more emotionally attached to another person, who we as adults know will probably not be a lifelong partner?
Having sex is one thing as a teenager, staying over and waking up with your boyfriend/girlfriend is like another stage, should it all be bundled into one?
What are your thoughts? How did you feel about it when your daughter was younger, do you feel differently now?
Do you have a son? Does he have girlfriends stay over?
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Send to friend Hi bea4, so will your children only bring their girl/boyfriends home after they have been seeing them for a while and introduced you first?
Would it be acceptable for them to bring someone home that you hadn't met, only to meet them at the breakfast table?
No...
But then with the three boys sharing a room and daughter's room having three and a half million soft toys in there (room teeny), I don't really think they'll try.... 
Hhmmmm, maybe not, hee hee! Was it all a cunning plan sparkling!
What about any of yours wanting to stay over at their respective girl/boyfriends??
I know I have to accept that they're growing up.... Not easy mind.
Do you think it is easier to let boys go and stay at their girlfriends, than daughters?
No.
What goes on outside the house though is difficult to control, and lord knows what things can be arranged for during the day.
Glad I live in a teeny house!! 
Is there anyone out there that thinks that we should not allow it? I definitely think that it is fine to say....you are not allowed to have sex, when I am in the house....then they have to use their discretion and hopefully keep the noise down!!
It is all about respect, respect for yourself, your body, your family and your home. However there is the other side that says that if we are allowing them to have males/females to sleep with them in their bed are we showing them the right boundaries?
hi anna
my daughter has quite a few male friends that are totally platonic and has at times shared a bed with them.. the best thing we can teach our kids is self respect.
to be honest we can't assume just cos they are sleeping in the same bed means they are having sex, i've found up to 4 body's in my daughters bed after a night out.. if you teach your kids physical boundries and have an open minded relationship with them i think that helps..
hiya
my son has stayed over at his grilfriends a few times now, in the beginning they were not allowed to share a bed which i totally agree with.. now her parents have gotten to know his intentions are genuine they have allowed them more freedom to be a couple.
i feel heart sorry for all the teenagers that haven't recieved guidence in this area and i teach my kids not to judge anyone.
I agree bea4, we can't assume that because they are sharing a bed they are up to stuff, although if alcohol is involved, it makes it easier for 'stuff' to happen!!
It is completely normal and healthy for our teens to have sexual relationships, but it is important that we teach them to trust their inner instinct and stick to their own boundaries.
By keeping things open means that they are not sneaking around behind out backs and it then becoming something that they are not in control of.
I personally wouldn't like it under a certain age or let it happen but if they are going to have sex then they will do it else where anyway
Hi Tinkerbell2, when you say 'under a certain age', what age are you thinking? 18? 16? 14?
Anna, sorry this is a late reply - I don't think it's a good idea to let them (I didn't let my oldest son have his girlfriend stay over in the same room) - however, I am sure that if they want to, they'll find a way anyhow.... No2 son hasn't asked to have his (now ex) girlfriend stay over, nor did he ask to stay at her house. No3 son and daughter aren't interested yet, so I'll cross that bridge when I come to it. It's difficult in my house anyway because rooms lead into oneanother, so there's always the possibility of being disturbed.... Ha!!! :-)
Well Anna at 18 they are an adult anyway- I guess it also depends on how mature the person(s) in question are- I would say 17 onwards is ok but I might think different by the time my little 1 gets a fella lol
Hi there,
I agree, we have to treat each teen and situation differently depending on their maturity and the amount of room there is in the house (and perhaps who their partner is)!
We have to adapt and shift as they grow and mature but we know what is right for our children, so it is important that we are the ones making the decisions rather than being coerced into it by our teen!
Sadly I think the answer for me would be different for a son and a daughter, which feels very sexist but I am being totally honest, I would have more concerns if I had a daughter. I have always had a very open relationship with my two sons and have taught them about contraception and we chat about what they want from life, and girlfriends etc.
As far as the age thing goes, I sort of think that 17 is about Ok, but I have no logical reason for saying that. If my son wanted to have his girlfriend stay here overnight then I would want to speak to her parents to Ok it first, even though they are both above the age of consent.
So, in other words, my thinking is pretty muddled on this subject!
I know I think it is a difficult one too. Maybe it feels like a complicated decision because probably most of us weren't allowed a boy/girlfriend even into our bedrooms when we were teens!! If I were to stay at my mums, I still wouldn't be able to share a room with a boyfriend now, only a husband!! 
I feel rather muddled about this as well, and tend to swing from thinking it would be o.k, to actually no i am not happy with that, i do speak with me older 3 about sex and relationships etc and we have a laugh about it, so i am not totally in the dark ages.
When it comes to my son the idea does not bother me as much as it does with my girls, not sure why that is. I jokingly tell the girls their not aloud to have boyfriends till their 30, which they reply "get real mum thats old"
I suppose i have to cross that particular bridge when i come to it , they are still on the young side emotionally and mentally.
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hiya
my sons 24 and my daughters 17 and they are completely different when it comes to their partners, the 7 years between them shows a strong generation gap.
my son is more serious when it comes to introducing girls to me, hes a good looking guy and i know hes had quite a few links (thats what they call it nowadays)..he's on his second actual girlfriend and i'm impressed by his standards.. they are both beautiful girls inside and out..
i know they would'nt dare have sex with me in the house because i'm unpredictable, many of times i've rushed through the bedroom door and shouted what you doing!!..payback for all those sleepless nights he gave me when he was teething!..lol
my daughter had her first serious boyfriend when she was 15, her boyfriend was 17 at the time and i know they waited till she was 16 before they became fully sexually active. he stayed over near enough every night, which gave me time to watch his moves, i could tell he was a bit of a "playa" but she loved him so i stepped back and let it unfold naturally.. she was always aware in her own head that rarley does your fisrt love last, its beautiful to watch your daughter become a woman..